Consistency and Persistence Truly Pays... A Short Story

This is an emergency and interesting story I want to share below 👇, and a testimony.

Many of you guys may not know but I got interested in blogging in the year 2012, immediately after my law school and call to the Nigerian Bar. 

Being the inquisitive and enterprising person that I am, I started off immediately as a crass and unrefined amateur who knew nothing about her newly found interest but I had determination and enthusiasm to learn all... or at least enough to get my by in the blog space.

So I checked out the most popular blog - building websites such as Blogger, WordPress, Wix and so on, as well as other sites to see how to design and beautify mine, and after much looking around I settled for the blogger platform because of its several easy to use features. I still use blogger till date and I don't see myself migrating to another anytime soon. I then built my first newbie blog. The first of many...

For the records, this very blog is about my eighth (8th) attempt, so you can imagine how many trials and error has gone under over the years. Even my late parents saw the determination and interest that I had in blogging and had to give in with their reserved support because they never understood it and time (life) wasn't fair to them to make them understand.

The only person who seemed and still seems to understand to am extent as well as support my blogging career is my Dear Husband Pastor John Anietoh.

WAIT! YOUR JOSEPH IS COMING.

Waiting has never been easy for any man. It's one of the most difficult things (not many things compare) to do in life......"WAIT".

-Ask Sarah in the Bible, she got frustrated of waiting, she had to force her husband to give the world Ishmael. The world is still paying dearly for that singular act of impatience till tomorrow.😭

-Ask King Saul, he got frustrated he went ahead to do the sacrifice that will seal his doom shamefully forever.

-Ask the children of Israel, they wearied of waiting for Moses and made for themselves idols to their ruin.

ASK RACHAEL.... (my focus this morning).

Rachael was beloved and industrious. She was beautiful and inspiring. Because of her, Jacob set a marriage standard that no man has been able to replicate... Rachel was cheated by her own dad in the name of custom. .... and when she finally claimed her place... her womb was shut.

10 THINGS YOU MUST DISCUSS IN COURTSHIP.

 

1. WHERE ARE YOU GOING TO LIVE AFTER WEDDING? Compulsory! So the guy won't drag you back to his father's house or squat with a friend. Discuss the type of apartment: a room,  room and parlour,  a mini flat,  2 bedroom flat,  3 bedroom,  duplex,  complex,  whatever,  talk,  thoroughly. Don't forget to discuss how rent will be paid. If he has built his house and you are moving in,  excellent.

2. WILL YOU HAVE BABIES IMMEDIATELY OR YOU WILL WAIT? Discuss thoroughly. If you will wait,  find out the best family planning method that will suit your body. Not all injections and pills are suitable for you. Withdrawal is not advisable for first time sex on honeymoon likewise condom. First sex should be done with abandon and also get used to each other's bodies especially as virgins. Singles who are sexually active right now are digging their marital grave. If you are already having sex like mad and taking family planning pills as a single lady,  it is a big shame and a disgrace to womanhood. Marry with dignity. Save sex till your wedding night.

3. HOW WILL BILLS BE PAID?

Who will pay the rent,  take care of bills and groceries? Is it the man? The woman or both of you? At how many percentage if it is a joint responsibility? 50/50? 80/20? 60/40? Discuss.

4. WILL ANY FAMILY MEMBER LIVE WITH YOU AFTER WEDDING? Discuss. Who and who will live with you? Why? For how long?  Can you cope having a family live with you immediately after honey moon? Can your type of accommodation allow such? It is not advisable for the opposite sex sibling to live with you after honey moon in a room apartment. It is more dangerous if it is the wife's very mature younger sister. Use your head!

Imperfect me serving a perfect God

 

The other day, I was spending time with a friend.  This friend calls herself a Christian, but doesn't always act like it, because some days she's on fire for the Lord, and other days life's struggles seem to get the best of her.

 So, as our eyes met, I really wanted to say something about it to her,  but decided to just let the Lord speak to her heart, knowing nothing I could say could ever possibly have the impact that the Lord making Himself real in her heart would make. 

  So I prayed with her. And after some time passed, I winked at her.... and walked away from the mirror!

#iamamasterpieceinthemaking

#GodIsStillWorkingOnMe

18 Mistakes Most Wives Make.

Marriage is Hard Work!

By the time every marriage goes past the honey moon stage and life begins to take its toll on both spouse (including and not limited to the coming in/birth of children, the marriage goes through some level of stress. 

In this part of the world, the 'burden' of carrying the burden of building a marriage is usually saddled on the shoulder of the wife, and coupled with her business/career/studies vis a vis pregnancy and child birth, she may tend to forget what it means to be sweet, romantic, intentional about herself and so on.

Below I have listed 18 of such lethal mistakes we wives make that tends to spell doom for every marriage.

1. PROLONGING SILENT TREATMENT WHEN OFFENDED TO SHOW YOU ARE ANGRY

This makes you and your husband used to not talking and makes you two draw further apart doing major damage to your communication. Even when he does wrong, get angry, but get to talk about it and forgive quickly

2. KILLING YOUR SOCIAL LIFE IN THE NAME OF BEING A GOOD WIFE

 Don't isolate yourself. Have mature friends to surround you, to grow with you as a wife. This makes your life richer, widens your worldview, challenges you and makes you less demanding on your husband's time. Again, make sure the lady friends you keep are of good character. You need fellow women who will stand with you, iron sharpens iron

3. OVER REACTING OR GETTING EASILY ANGRY 

When your husband reveals to you information and you over react or you become highly suspicious or critical of him, that will discourage him from sharing matters with you in future and he will begin to be secretive, not because he wants to but because he would rather avoid the toxic environment you bring when over reacting. Secrecy opens up a door to many dangers in your marriage.

Special Edition: Sourcing For Additional Income Come 2022?? This Post is For You.

 

The world is generally operating on a tough financial economy and Nigeria is somehow worse off.  In order to beat the game and escape the heat of the current financial problems, smart individuals and budding entrepreneurs have began looking within for ways to create more wealth aside the normal 8 - 5 day time job. 

Marriage Realities From An African Context

 

Marriages in Nigeria and most parts of Africa are sustained by women. You can argue this with your village deity. Women in general, put up with a lot of bullshit just to make their marriages work. From childhood they have been taught that a wise woman keeps her home. In order to keep their homes, they end up enduring a lot of ill-treatment. 

Find any woman who has been with a man for donkey years and ask her if she would love to marry that same man over again in her next life. Majority would say no. This brings us to the point that most marriages are endurance marriages not happy marriages. Unfortunately, we are told that marital success is about duration. 

A successful marriage isn't about duration but happiness. If two people spend five years together, happily and add immense value to each other; if they decide to break up without fighting about it, their marriage can be rated as successful. Spending eternity together in sorrow isn't the idea of success to me. It is what you do in the marriage that counts not how long. 

Thinking Of Getting Married Someday? Here Are Three Ways Being Happily Married Will Make You A Better Person..

Marriage especially when done right is not just a good thing but a full packaged blessing. Everyone desires to be married and be happy in it and it is more than important to us children of God because it was initiated and instituted by Our Heavenly Father from the creation of man to fulfill His divine plan for mankind and our earthly mandate. 

However, the very many challenges that besiege marriages of our generation, many of which ending up in divorce, makes it less and less attractive to so many people including members of the body of Christ. 

Understanding the Unique Differences Between The Needs of A Man and A Woman

Intrinsically, the males and females are designed uniquely, their wants defer greatly. It is the understanding of these unique differences in them that brings about a rewarding friendship, union or marriage. When their unique differences are blended harmoniously, it gives God glory. We need to understand these differences God created in males and females.

Furthermore, when we know about our differences in the way males and females think, act and respond, we will hardly have quarrels in interpersonal and intrapersonal relationships with friends, or in male-female relationships and even marriages. In this way we will work cooperatively in fulfilling God`s purposes, and putting the devil into shame.

 

We will be looking at five distinct differences between the desires of males and females.

How do I tell him no sex before marriage

The future and destiny of your marriage is too important and sacrosanct not to discuss the issue of premarital sex before hand and take and agreeable stand on it. 

Let’s talk about sex baby! If you don’t know where that line is from, please kneel down next time to greet me 😂😂 (just joking!) But seriously, can we talk about sex? Or more importantly, can we talk about how to avoid having sex as a singleton? Maybe you’ve been thinking “I don’t want to have sex before marriage; what do I do?” Here’s some practical help.

Are You The Value Added Woman/Wife (VAW)

No sensible man can resist a woman who is beautiful and industrious.

What made a man work for 7 years for the woman he loved and yet felt like he just worked for 7 days? 

Value!

'My man does not respect me' 

It is because you are a no Value- Added-Woman (VAW)

Who is a husband supposed to submit to?

The issue of submission is a very delicate, core and often deal breaking when it comes to marital relationship. It is usually of paramount importance to almost all husbands as it touches the position of  their headship in the home. A man can literally jettisoned his wife if he has concluded that his wife doesn't submit to him and in turn doesn't respect him. It has nothing to do with looks or qualification and a man can literally sell his entire generation just to be with a woman who respects his headship by submitting to him. Most women have been trained to recognize and ascribe great importance to submission to her husband in marriage, but the big question now is do men need to submit as well in order to create the desired balance in the home; and if they do need to submit then to who?

Ten Common Lies Our Men Tell

 

For most human beings, telling a few lies now and then seems to be a second nature. We all are usually good at telling 'necessary white lies' to either avoid being questioned, attacked or even misunderstood. The men folk are no different as rather than getting into an argument or fight with their we their wives. They'd rather tell a quick little harmless lie to cover up their trail and allow peace to reign. 

A Proverbs 31 Wife

A wife is a woman lawfully and legally married to a man. Every wife is prima facie a woman but not every woman is a wife. The Holy Bible which is the everyday living manual for the Children of God on all aspects of life whether spiritual or physical (including marriage affairs) has spelt out detailed instructions on how marriage as a whole should work if it is to function properly and succeed, the roles and responsibilities of both the husband and wife and how a wife if she is to build up her home and bring favour as well as God's blessings on her husband and entire household must conduct herself.

According to the Bible which is the living word of God, a wife is the only person God calls a helper (or a helpmeet) to another individual (who must be her husband) after the Holy Spirit ( who Himself is God and the third person of the Holy Trinity).

Who are your friends???

I guess the age-long sayings that birds of the same feather flock together and show me your friends and I will tell you who you are were both borne out of the wise realization that one's friends have a lot to contribute to the actualization or abortion of a man's greatness and destiny fulfilment in life. Friends have a very strong influence in each other's lives. They can either be a ladder to climb to success in life or not just pull one down but also bury one's destiny forever.

Do you want to succeed and be fulfilled in life? Then you must avoid these road pitfalls...

Who doesn't want to succeed and be fulfilled in life? Every living soul wants to even he who is dead lazy. We all desire to finish running our individual races in life with that satisfaction that yes we succeeded and that our success is not just a testimony for those behind but also a lasting legacy for them.

However, since no man is an island and no single tree makes a forest; then we all need people to assist us on our journey to the top. That very journey must be traveled with caution as there would be certain ups and downs, rough paths here and there will we make this sensitive journey to fulfilment in life and some of them are.

Why are most women attracted to tall guys?

Dear Ladies: Marriage (the type that is healthy, mutually satisfying/fulfilling and lasts forever is beyond just physical looks, fleeting feelings or even a fat bank account. To avoid stories that touch and make us cry...

Bounced Back after a loss

My people how una dey... E don't try no be small. What happened while I was away. Well on my own end I lost my mum on the 7th of May 2019 (last month) her demise officially made my siblings and I orphans (having lost our dad in June 2015, barely four years ago).

This and That about marriage

When you let God lead you to the spouse or life partner that He preserved you for, it will all fall into place beautifully. His or her heart won't be in any way cracked how much more broken. You may need to wait long for him or her to come along and watch many others jump the broom before you but your waiting is never a waste. His best for may not always come in your dream package but since God will never give you a blessing of management, then he or she will never need fixing at all. He or she will just be your perfect fit and everything you NEED in life to fulfill destiny.

Coping with your husband's ego.

my sugar boi

Marriage is hard! Those of us in it sometimes want to escape, and those that are yet to get hooked are killing themselves just to get in. Let me share a personal experience with us today, awhile ago, my husband and I were getting into frequent misunderstandings (due to differences in our backgrounds and temperamental dispositions), until we both realised that beautiful marriages don't just happen because we wish them to, nor because the parties involved are good looking, but because they both make conscious individualistic and collective efforts and sacrifices at making theirs work out beautifully. One of such ways is in DEALING WITH ONE'S PERSONAL EGO.

To my understanding, your ego is that protective wall we build over time as we grow into matured adults over our hearts, personality and self esteem. Thank God for 'egos' for it helps us to build strong, healthy and well-guarded personalities until...